umunsi .comUrukundo ruratangaje abantu baba bakundana bagendana nyuma yakaza inkubiri igatuma batandukana burundu.Ese kuki mwatandukanye ? Ese ujya wumva hashobora kuboneka impamvu yatuma musubirana mwemb ? Fata umwanya wawe usome iyi nkuru umenye impamvu uba wumva mwakongera gukundana kandi mwaratanye.
Sibyiza n’ubwo biba, gutandukana n’uwo mukundana n’uburibwe bizana ni ikintu gishobora rwose gushengura umutima kikawunegekaza. Ku bw’amahirwe make, nta buryo bworoshye bwo guhangana n’agahinda ugira iyo bikubayeho kuko nta muhanga wari yandika agatabo kaguha inama zifatika kandi zitomoye zigusobanurira uko wikuramo umuntu ukunda.Mu gihe bamwe bibafata igihe gito guhita bakomeza ubuzima bakikuramo umubano w’urukundo warangiye bahozemo, hari abo bifata igihe cy’amezi cyangwa kinarenga, basa n’abari mu kiriyo cy’urukundo batakaje. Ku kigero cyose cy’agahinda waba ufite, ni ingenzi cyane kwibuka ko ubuzima butarangirira aho.
Wowe uri gusoma iyi nkuru ntabwo ukwiye kureka gukunda dore ko Abameramana gukunda ari ryo tegeko riruta ayandi twahawe n’Imana yacu .Nta cyo bitwaye kumva hari urugero runaka rw’agahinda gashengura umutima wagize, gusa byatebuka cyangwa bigatinda, wakenera ubufasha bwakunyuza muri iki cyiciro cy’ubuzima kitoroha.Ubu rero, twifashishije inkuru yasohotse ku rubuga lifehack, turakugezaho ingingo 10 zisa n’utunama twagufasha kwikuramo uwo wankundaga mwatandukanye utabyifuza cyangwa waramukunze we atagukunda.Mbere ya byose, ukwiye kumenya ko nta gatabo k’amategeko kagena igihe bizagufata kwikuramo no kwimara agahinda uterwa n’icyo kintu ariko reka izi nama tukugira zizakubere urumuri:
1. Ibuka ko nta na rimwe izuba rirenga, n’iyo rirenze rirongera rikarasa
Imenye ! Uzakenera ubwawe kwigenera igihe cyo kubabara koko, kandi nta mpamvu yo kwishyiraho igitutu cyo kuba hari igihe utarenza ukiri mu gahinda. Menya ko igihe ubwacyo ari cyo kimara agahinda hafi ya kose umuntu yagira.Igihe bifata ngo ube wikuyemo umuntu ukunda, giterwa n’uburyo urukundo rwanyu rwari rumeze, n’ikigero wamukundagaho. Abantu bamwe bibafata igihe gito ngo barenge akababaro baterwa no gutandukana n’abo bakundanye, mu gihe abandi bakenera igihe kirekire kurushaho bitewe n’uburyo basanzwe bakunda, ikigero bimariramo uwo bakunze ndetse n’uburyo babasha kwihanganira ibidashimishije bibagwiririye.
Ababiri (couples) bamaze igihe kirekire bakundana bashobora gukenera igihe kirekire cyo gukira no gukomeza ubuzima bwabo iyo urukundo rwabo rurangiye. Gusa uko icyo gihe cyaba kirekire kose, wowe ukwiye gufata igihe cyo gukira ndetse ukiga uko wakomeza inzira yawe utari kumwe na runaka cyangwa nyirarunaka.Ibuka ko ari ingenzi kumara igihe cya ngombwa mu gahinda kuko biguha neza irembo rifunga ibyo wahozemo kandi bikagufungurira andi marembo akuganisha ku kindi gice (chapitre) cy’ubuzima bwawe.
2. Iyemerere kumva amarangamutima yawe
Urukundo rubamo inyanja y’amarangamutima ushobora kogamo ku buryo kuyiheza ngo uyambuke biba ihurizo rikomeye cyane. Na ko ntiwanayiheza.Aya marangamutima aguhuza n’umukunzi wawe boshye abanywanye, ndetse iyo umubano wanyu urangiye, bisa n’aho noneho uba ugiye kwibasirwa n’umwuzure w’amarangamutima mabi (negative emotions).Ni ingenzi cyane kuri wowe gufata aya marangamutima ukayakira ntakuganze. Uburibwe bwo mu marangamutima ugira nyuma yo gutandukana n’uwo wakundaga azwiho kuba asa n’ibimenyetso by’agahinda gakabije (depression), bituma uba ugomba gufatirana ukiyitaho.Ukenera kwakira aya marangamutima mabi ukabana na yo niba ushaka kumenya uko wakira igikomere cy’urukundo rutakomeje [It’s okay]. Wikwibuza kumva bene ayo marangamutima kuko ubwacyo ari igice cy’urugendo rwo gukira. Bizakwemerera kuva mu mubano warimo.
Ushobora kumva ufite ishavu, ubabaye kandi ukomeretse- ushobora kumva bisa n’ibitihanganirwa. Bamwe bumva basa n’abatawe abandi bakumva uguhangayika gusa n’ukugenda kugaruka. Icyakora, ibi byiyumvo cyangwa amarangamutima adufasha muri uru rugendo rwo kubabara.Hazabaho ibihe uzumva ko ibi bikomere nta ho bizajya. Icyakora, ni ingenzi kwibuka ko nta gahora gahanze, nta cyagize itangiriro kitagize iherezo. Nk’ibindi byiyumvo byose, aya marangamutima ntezaburibwe azahita agende.
3. Siba (umu-Ex) mwahoze mukundana ku mbuga nkoranyambaga na telephone yawe
Ntanubwo ari byiza ko wowe n’uwo mwahoze mukundana mukomeza gukururana kumbuga nkoranya mbaga cyangwa muhamagarana , fata umwanya wawe umusibe hose.
4.Ibuka kwikunda
Ihereze umwanya wose wari waramugeneye muri wowe.Burya ni wowe wambere wo kwiyitaho, fata umwanya wawe wikunde kandi bizaba byiza byose.
5. Andika uko wiyumva
Fata umwanya aho ugize ikibazo wandike, aho ubabaye wandike, ariko wirinde kujya mu nkuru ndende z’ubuzima bwawe.
6.Fata imbaraga zawe uzihinduremo ikintu cyiza.Iyi nkuru tuyikesha ikinyamakuru rwandamagazine.
