umunsi .comMu buzima busanzwe bijya bibaho ko umugabo ajya gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina n’uwo bashakanye bikamugora cyangwa akabura ubushake burundu. Iki ni ikibazo gishobora gusenya urugo ,cyane ko gutera akabariro hagati y’abashakanye ari inkingi ya mwamba yubaka urugo.
Ariko se umugabo ufite iki kibazo akwiriye kwiheba?Izi nama zikurikira nizo umugabo ukunda kubura ubushake bwo gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina yakurikiza zikamufasha.
Biganirize umugore wawe.Ibyishimo mu gutera akabariro ntibiva kure. Kuganira ,kwigishanya,gutegurana..Niba ujya ugira ikibazo ko igitsina cyawe kidahita gifata umurego ,wibyihererana . Umugorera wawe ashobora gukeka byinshi :ko utamukunda,umuca inyuma.. Birasanzwe musobanurire abimenye. Bishobora kuba biterwa n’ibintu byinshi:Umunaniro,ibibazo ufite,..Nubisobanurira mugenzi wawe azashyiramo imbaraga agufashe kugira ubushake.
Banza ufate ikiruhuko. 80% by’ibabazo bituma igitsina cy’umugabo kidafata umurego biterwa n’umunaniro. Umunaniro n’umwanzi wa mbere w’imigenderekere myiza y’akabariro hagati y’abakudana cyane ku mugabo(gufata umurego kw’igitsina cye). Mbere yo gukora iki gikorwa byaba byiza ubanje ugakaraba umubiri wose nyuma ugafata ikiruhuko gihagije uryamye. Si byiza ko wihutira gutera urubariro ku rugo kandi ugifite umunaniro n’ibibazo by’akazi wiriwemo. Mu gihe cy’igikorwa mugomba kubanza gutegurana kugira ngo urusheho kubanza guha igitsina cyawe umurego.
Imyitozo ngororamubiri ni ingenzi. Duhora tubivuga kandi tuzakomeza tubibakangurira,gukora imyitozo ngororamubiri. Gukora imyitozo ngororamubiri bifasha umutima gutera neza ,bifasha imiyoboro y’amaraso gutembereza neza amaraso mu mubiri wose. Uko amaraso atembera neza,niko n’ubushyuhe bwiyongera mu mubiri .Bityo ntube wahura n’iki kibazo cyo kubura ubushake mu gihe cyo gutera akabariro.
Bituma umubiri wawe ugendera ku murongo bityo nujya gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina ntuzishakisha cyane nk’umuntu uhora yicaye. Ubushakashatsi bwakozwe na Journal Medical de la Sexualité bwerekanye ko 45% by’abagabo badakora imyitozo ngororamubiri bageze mu kigero cy’imyaka 40 bahura n’iki kibazo cyo kwishakisha bakibura mu gihe bagiye gutera akabariro n’abo bashakanye.
Reka itabi. Kureka itabi ni byiza ku buzima ariko bikaba akarusho ku mugabo wifuza ko igitsina cye gifata umurego mu buryo butagoranye. Ubushakashatsi bwerekanye ko abagabo banywa amasigara 10 ku munsi biyongerera ibyago byo kutagira ubushake buhagije, 16 % kuruta abatanywa itabi. Uyu mubare ugera kuri 36% ku bagabo banywa amasigara hagati ya 11 na 20. Gira vuba tangira ushake uko wava ku itabi ritazagusenyera. Niba ufite n’umugabo unywa itabi,bimukangurire bizabafasha mwembi.
Shyira urusenda mu mafunguro.Buri uko ufashe ifunguro byaba byiza ushyizeho n’urusenda. Urusenda rwongera uburyohe bw’ibiryo ariko burya ahanini rugira n’irindi banga ryo kukongerera ubushyuhe mu mubiri. Mu gihe cy’ibyumweru bibiri ururya buri munsi uzambwira uko uzaba umerewe mu gihe cy’ijoro ry’urukundo.
Fata ku gasembuye.N’ ubwo hari amadini atemerera abayoboke bayo kunywa ibisindisha,hari aho bigira umumaro. Ujye nibura unywa icupa cyangwa abiri mu cyumweru na byo bizagufasha kuzamura ubushyuhe mu mubiri wawe wari usanganywe. Abarokore bo twabagira inama yo kwihatira urusenda kuko rwo ntirubujijwe.
Ariko se umugabo ufite iki kibazo akwiriye kwiheba?Izi nama zikurikira nizo umugabo ukunda kubura ubushake bwo gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina yakurikiza zikamufasha.
Kureka itabi ni byiza ku buzima ariko bikaba akarusho ku mugabo wifuza ko igitsina cye gifata umurego mu buryo butagoranye. Ubushakashatsi bwerekanye ko abagabo banywa amasigara 10 ku munsi biyongerera ibyago byo kutagira ubushake buhagije, 16 % kuruta abatanywa itabi. Uyu mubare ugera kuri 36% ku bagabo banywa amasigara hagati ya 11 na 20. Gira vuba tangira ushake uko wava ku itabi ritazagusenyera. Niba ufite n’umugabo unywa itabi,bimukangurire bizabafasha mwembi.
Shyira urusenda mu mafunguro.Buri uko ufashe ifunguro byaba byiza ushyizeho n’urusenda. Urusenda rwongera uburyohe bw’ibiryo ariko burya ahanini rugira n’irindi banga ryo kukongerera ubushyuhe mu mubiri. Mu gihe cy’ibyumweru bibiri ururya buri munsi uzambwira uko uzaba umerewe mu gihe cy’ijoro ry’urukundo.
Fata ku gasembuye. N’ ubwo hari amadini atemerera abayoboke bayo kunywa ibisindisha,hari aho bigira umumaro. Ujye nibura unywa icupa cyangwa abiri mu cyumweru na byo bizagufasha kuzamura ubushyuhe mu mubiri wawe wari usanganywe. Abarokore bo twabagira inama yo kwihatira urusenda kuko rwo ntirubujijwe.
UMURYANGO.RW
